Winter Really Does Turn Into Spring, Eventually.

Undoubtedly, my engagement to Danny on March 18th was the biggest, most note-worthy event of the year thus far. But here are a few highlights as winter turned to spring:

First hockey game!  It was momentous, and I got a free T-shirt.  Winning. 

Ugh.  Done with this business of winter.  But I always love a good girls night in with the roommates!

 Finally!!!!!!!

 This is why I am marrying Danny.  Truth.  And also his thoughtfulness, as evidenced below.  :-)

I'm always a sucker for a good sunset.  And the cherry blossoms at sunset?  Definitely worth seeing. 

 When Spring finally comes, I just can't get enough of it.

Nor can I get enough of General Conference weekend, with my niece, good treats, and my fiance.  Oh man, is he the cutest, or what??

Temple day for the soon-to-be Stokers.

My college friend Aaron came to town with the musical Jersey Boys, and Danny was a gem and got some tickets for us to see the show.  He's wonderful,  and it was so fun to see Aaron. 

Becca and Sarah headed up organizing matching outfits for the nieces and nephews for the wedding, and...introducing my new niece Kate!  In her adorable dress!  

 At the end of April I went home to find a wedding dress and do some planning.  And to see my mom, who's health had been on the fritz.  Getting old is the worst.  But this view from my parents' back porch?  Kind of the best.

  

 Found this picture in a frame at home.  Couldn't resist throwing it up on social media for National Siblings Day.  Oh man, it's good, in all our 90's family reunion finery.

 Anyway, back to the present and wedding dress shopping with some of my favorite women!  I found an amazing dress that I loved, and got so much done in two days I couldn't believe it.  Major thanks to these ladies for the major support, even though that particular day was a really hard one for Teresa.  7 months since Layne passed.

 And seeing these girls in their wedding finery!  Oh, my heart.

 

Again, why Danny and I are getting married.  Just a little sneak peak at our engagement photos. 

I really do like my neighborhood.  Especially when it's not snowing....

Danny and I met up with a friend from NYC, Kristin Robinson, and visited the Renwick Gallery.  It was awesome. 

And another NYC friend, Sara Moncivais, made us a paper chain for a countdown.  She wrote quotes about love and marriage in each one.  A more thoughtful gift I really can't imagine!

I still never tire of finding a beautiful path to run on.  And it was a beautiful day.  And in the meantime, we were planning, planning, planning.....

Shameless Sharing- After All, This is My Blog.

This is a letter I got for my birthday from Carolynn.  My sister is one of the most thoughtful people I know.  She always remembers a birthday, anniversary or other major events and will always reach out.  She is the one to all and get "the scoop," because she cares so much.  Anyway, this meant a lot to me, so I wanted to save and share it.  

Dear Nicole,

I wanted to put all of these on Instagram, but thought that would drive the rest of  my followers just a tiny bit crazy (you know, all 18 of them). Plus, I wanted you to be able to see the pics a little bigger. 

Here are some pics illustrating qualities in you that I just love!

I love that you are such a great aunt…and sister, and daughter! You take all your roles in our family very seriously. You make each person feel loved, and even though our family is huge, we each really do feel that love from you. You make each one feel noticed and important. I know my kids absolutely ADORE you!

It’s easy to see why you are such an adored aunt! You get in there and play with the kiddos, no matter what they are doing. I am confident you’ll keep that playfulness when you become a mom and your kids will know they’ve got the most fun mom around—and their friends will have to agree!

I love that we are such good friends, even though we are 13 years apart! And I love that even though you are a performer, actor, singer, entertainer…ETC! (and I am SO NOT!), it still feels like we have so much in common…hiking, yoga, loving on our families, chatting, laughing, having fun; the list goes on and on! I love all our shared memories!

Wait, didn’t I just send this in movie form? No, I did not! It’s another Nicole/Sarah crazy dance. Did I mention you are FUN?!?!!?

I love this one because it represents not only that you are a GREAT AUNT, as mentioned, and that you make each one of us feel important, but you are a good listener. I have no doubt this this pic represents a really great chat you had with Amy! Part of why you are a good listener is because you just listen. You don’t interrupt. You don’t judge. You don’t try to fix things. You just listen compassionately and lovingly. This is an awesome quality and you excel at it.

I love that you are not too much of a girlie-girl (which I confess I am!). You don’t worry about openly and authentically enjoying your food! You don’t worry about having to look perfect at all times, with every hair in place and make-up on. Your more relaxed approach to these superficial parts of life let you have more fun yourself and makes you more fun to be around. Maybe I can be more like you in this way, someday! 

I love that you love all of your sistas!!!!! We have so much fun together and we love you too!

Wait. Did I already mention you’re a great aunt!!?!?!?!

Pretty sure that whatever we were laughing at and all the dancing in this picture was instigated by you!!!

I love seeing you with all your nieces and nephews of every age. This one with Stella makes me so excited for you to be a mama! You are going to be a GREAT one!

I love that your extremely fun side doesn’t in any way diminish your spiritual side! This pic of us at the temple reminds me of the spiritual journey you’ve been on your whole life, which has intensified in the last 10 years. I can clearly see that you have a very personal relationship with God and with Jesus Christ, because you have done the work to get to know them and to honor and obey them. 

How is it that I can hang out with you endlessly and never get tired of it? Not only are you so fun to be with, but you’re an easy houseguest—helpful, grateful, and a genuine joy to have around.

Another trait I SO admire in you, but don’t have myself, is your sense of adventure. I love it! 

Love this. Even when everyone else is falling over from exhaustion, you somehow manage to keep the party going!

More sista-love!

Two things: 1. Did I mention you’re a great aunt?????? 2. No female can rock a baseball hat like you! Which is pretty important, because Danny does a great job of that too!

Caden said, “Spot the Nicole!” You can make the most random moments into an event, by the sheer joy of your personality. Such a great trait!

Had to get all your sistas in here for more sista love!

And one final dancing shot. This I love. Because anyone who knows you knows you have not had an easy road. You have had to dig really deep and do lots of work to get to where you are now. You have had to pass through a lot of pain, adversity, and gut-wrenching, heartbreaking sorrow. Yet, you deliberately and proactively pulled yourself up by the bootstraps and took on that work. You also never lost your sense of joy, playfulness, humor, compassion, and kindness. You have triumphed over your adversities in a monumental way, while being true to the absolutely beautiful (in all ways) Nicole that we each love and adore. 

How GRATEFUL we are to be in the same family!!!!!!! I love you, my boys all love you, my hubby loves you. You are awesome and we couldn’t be happier that Danny’s got that figured out too.

Happy Birthday!

Love, Carolynn and the Spencer crew

March, 2016. 

Every Girl Gets Engaged and has a Brithday the Same Weekend, Right?

I almost made these two different posts; my engagement deserves its own, right?  But the timing was too intertwined.  So here we are.  

Danny and I had looked at rings, decided on one, and it was getting sized.  Danny, NOT one who likes to keep a secret, made it clear that as soon as he had it back he was going to propose.  He also said he didn't want to do it on my birthday, nor did he want to do it on the March 19th, as on that day in 2010, I had left Cristian.  So on the 17th, when he told me he was going to pick up the ring, I knew the proposal had to happen on the 18th, which was a Friday.  But let me back up...

On the 16th, I went to dinner with a couple of my roommates and girlfriends for my birthday.  I chose Johnny Rockets because sometimes, a girl just needs a good burger and fries.  I'm pretty classy.  Anyway, it was really fun.  We ate, we laughed, the girls probed about what my status with Danny was and I lied through my teeth like a champion.  We had a sweet, hapless server who was probably about 16, and on his first week of his first job.  It was precious.  

 

The manager took a bad, blurry picture of us, and my roommate Jenny got a great picture of the manager singing me "Happy Birthday" with gusto.  (For the record, I hate that song being sung to me.  It's awkward).

 

Then Bryana and Katy made my night by striking some great poses with the light pole while telling some story I don't even remember, that apparently had inspired those poses in the first place.  But all I can say is, this is why we are friends. 

 

 

It was a good moment, and a great night.  

Friday, March 18th.  I pretty much knew I was going to get engaged that night.  I barely made it through the day.  Danny met me at work and took me to dinner at a gourmet grilled cheese restaurant.  Again, we are totally classy.  Only gourmet grilled cheese for us! Seriously though, it was so good.  Then we went on a walk.  I had no idea where we were going, but the suspense was killing me.  We ended up at Thomas Circle Park, which is really more of a roundabout with a big statue in the middle of a large intersection in downtown DC.  

 

But on two corners of that intersection are two old, beautiful churches.  It is Danny's favorite spot in the city because he loves to look at those churches.  I just knew it was going to happen any minute, and was all of a sudden nervous!  We hugged, kissed, Danny got quiet and pensive; I could tell he was gearing up to ask. 

He opened his mouth, and said, "Do you want to keep walking?"  

???!!!!

"Sure....?"  (He later claimed it was the traffic and general busy-ness of the place in the latter part of the evening rush hour that made him change his mind at the last second. I would also say it had something to do with the construction worker 20 feet away eating his dinner).

So we kept walking. It grew quieter as we found a random street and ducked into a small courtyard leading into an apartment building.  All I know is it was across the street from the National Geographic building.  We

sat on a bench for a few minutes.  Danny got on one knee, and just very simply asked me to marry him.  I looked him in the eye and said, "With my whole heart." 

So simple, and so lovely.  

As we were post-proposal canoodling, a pregnant woman walked by and toward the building.  We stopped her right as she was about to walk in and asked her to take a picture. She very hesitantly, semi-irritatedly agreed.  As soon as I told her we just got engaged, she got REALLY excited and took lots of great pictures of us, exactly the way we wanted.  Largely un-posed.  

 

 

We walked back through the city, me staring at my ring, of course.  As we crossed one crosswalk, a Muslim woman took out her ear buds to yell, "Congratulations!"  Ha!  Was I that obvious?

Kind of obnoxious, but I had to for some of my girlfriends.

We got back to my house and the calls began.  First the parents, then the siblings.  It took the rest of the night.  Then, we finally posted a picture on social media and things exploded from there.  Who knew hundreds of people would be so excited about two kids in their 30's getting hitched?  :-) We actually did feel very loved from all corners of our world.  Facebook and Instagram are fun that way.  Either way, I will never forget that night.  We were so happy, but mostly, relieved that we could finally just be open about what we had known for a few weeks already.   It just felt right, and like it was really time to be engaged.  

I had taken longer than Danny to be ready.  I was scared of the commitment.  Committing again to marriage after my experience the first time around was no small leap for me.  When it came down to it, it wasn't so much questioning whether Danny and I were a good fit for each other.  We worked well, and we both knew it.  It was more the whole concept of marriage again.  It really took me a while to wrap my brain around it again and not be deep-down terrified.  It was almost like a mental step I couldn't take yet.  And in the meantime, poor Danny was just trying to gauge where I was on a given day and meet me there, but I knew he was ready.  But after some back and forth on my part, and knowing I couldn't do that forever, I finally received some beautiful personal revelation that gave me the extra confirmation and courage I needed to take that leap.   And I have never looked back.  It's amazing how the Lord knows us, and knows just what we need.  He knew I needed to be sure this was right and it was time.  And I'm so grateful.

Thank goodness, because my mom was beside herself, just waiting.  "It's about time!!!"  Ha!

Quick circle-back: finished out the weekend on my birthday with a double birthday celebration with my roommate Pam, who's birthday was only a couple of days from mine.  Desserts and friends and my new, handsome fiance.  What could be better? Nothing, I say. Nothing.