Monday, May 5, 2014

Circling The Wagons


In the days of the Great Emigration, pioneers would travel in wagon trains.  At night, they would line up all their wagons, end to end, in a large circle for protection from the outside.  Inside that circle were the camp fires, family, tents, and safety.  They might hold an impromptu dance or tell stories.  Or just huddle together for warm and comfort.  The design of such a configuration was a protection against any kind of danger on the outside, be it large animals or the Native American tribes in certain areas who would not welcome their presence.  I believe it also aided in bonding that group of people together in one purpose.  Hence, the term, "circling the wagons" was born.

This is a post about my family.  There's a lot of us.  I mean, a lot.  We are an imperfect bunch, but we like each other anyway.  Most people reading know this, but I will reiterate that I have six older siblings, all with spouses, two parents, and 29 nieces and nephews, with little Maggie bringing up the rear as of a few weeks ago.  So, there is no shortage of personality, opinion, and shenanigans.  I love them.

When C decided to end our marriage, I told my parents, but couldn't muster the strength to tell the rest of my family.  So my parents sent out an email to everyone.  Even as I type, the memory of the immediate response of love and support from every corner of my family still makes me emotional, over four years later.  I was totally enfolded into their protection.  As the only member of my family to go through a divorce, no on really knew exactly what to do to help.  But that didn't matter; they were all there for me in their individual capacities, and I felt that, even if they weren't with me physically.

My sister in law, Becca, came from two hours away to help me pack.  The day I left, she came back with my parents to pack up the rest of my things and get them ready to ship.  Then I went to North Carolina where Mom and Dad were waiting for me at Dave and Becca's house.  David then drove across the country with me back to Utah, taking a week off of work to do so.  I will never forget those incredible acts of love and service.

As I moved forward, I came to really appreciate the scripture in the Book of Mormon that says,

And it came to pass that he said unto them: Behold, here are the waters of Mormon (for thus were they called) and now, as ye are adesirous to come into the bfold of God, and to be called his people, and are willing to bear one another’s burdens, that they may be light;
 Yea, and are awilling to mourn with those that bmourn; yea, and comfort those that stand in need of comfort, and to stand as cwitnesses of God at all times and in all things, and in all places that ye may be in, even until death, that ye may be redeemed of God, and be numbered with those of the dfirst resurrection, that ye may have eternal life—
(Mosiah 18:8-9) 

My family exemplified that passage for me, especially the parts about mourning with those that mourn, and bearing one another's burdens, and giving comfort.  I guess that's when I started to think more about the phrase and meaning of "circling the wagons."  That's what my family did.  As soon as I needed help, the wagons were circled, and the place of protection was secured.  

Since then, we have had other events or things happen in my family where there has been a call to circle the wagons.  It never fails.  Every time, we respond as a unit. And now, I get to be one of the responders, not the one needing the care and protection.  It feels really good to be able to give back.
 

 Here's one example: my brother in law, Layne, has stage 4 colorectal cancer.  Two years ago, as he was diagnosed, our whole family pulled together to support him, Teresa and their family on this journey.  It has not been easy for them.  I don't have a lot to say about it in this moment besides, cancer sucks.
 

Layne used to be a runner.  The year before he was diagnosed, he ran a marathon.  Once his treatment started, his running days were severely curtailed, to say the least.  Well, Layne has been a little more stable for the last few months, so he decided he wanted to run again.  It was really tough for him, but he had a goal of running a 5K to raise money for the Huntsman Cancer Center, where he is receiving his treatment.  So, as a family, we decided we would run with him.
On April 19th, those of us who could participate ran/walked/biked/hiked a 5K at the same time as Layne, wherever we were. Becca had this great idea to all wear navy blue, which apparently is the official color for colon cancer.  Then she made these Tshirts for those who would be at the finish line to see he and Jacob, who ran with him, finish the race.
 

It was a great day to be a Riding!  I was with my family even as I ran by myself in Prospect Park in Brooklyn (gorgeous).  That day we circled in celebration, and after all Layne has been through, it really felt good!

Life is so HARD sometimes.  It just is, and there is nothing we can do about that.  And everyone's hard is different.  The range of trials we have in our family is quite the variety.  But I was so thankful for that circle of wagons when I really needed it.
  And I am so thankful that now I get to be one that brings my little wagon in line with all the rest whether someone else I love needs that safety and protection, or just a big dance around the campfire with a fiddle.  (No one in my family actually plays the fiddle, sadly.  But you can't have everything, I guess).




10 comments:

  1. This is great, Nicole! I'm so glad to be a part of this family, too. Love you!

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  2. I love the whole metaphor and very thoughtful treatment of this topic. Great job! I love best being part of this family!!!!!!!

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  3. I am trying to write this has my eyes are blurred with moisture. What tender words. Thank you, Nicole. How proud I am of every one of our family. Supporting one another is what life is all about. Sweet memories of this sharing time! JoDaG

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  4. This is a tear jerker. You came to the circle with your wagon loaded with words of wisdom and love. We can all relate and be grateful our family support will never be in question. What a blessing! Love ya so much, Mom

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  5. You have one of the best families in the whole world! So grateful for the time I got to spend getting to know some of them back in the land of Walnut Creek!

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  6. Totally crying. This is the sweetest.

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  7. Totally crying. This is the sweetest.

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  8. ^^ what Jen said. So glad you put the link to this post because I was never able to read it! xoxoxoox

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